I don’t have kids, so as we have found on the internets, that makes me more qualified to comment than actual parents.
I suppose the actual punishment would depend on the situation – I used to get sent to my room, but if I’d had a stereo, My Pod, Computer and a flat screen TV, it wouldn’t have been so effective.
The most effective parenting I see from friends involves a small chat, reasoning with the kindliest and asking if they could think about the effects of what they have done to the victims. Thinking seems to be far more effective than shouting or smacking, or other forms of capsicum related torture. I’ve seen adults get quite sick quite quickly after ingesting chili – I don’t think it’s a reasonable or effective thing to do to a child, no. It doesn’t address the behavior, so all they will learn is to ask Mum for the apple next time.
A little girl was “rude” to a grown man. He says nothing, but waits and then rubs hot pepper on a piece of fruit and gives it to her. Then he watches her eat from “the corner laughing”.
If you slice the mildest jalapeno pepper, do you want to rub the juice on your lips? On the Sackville scale, a Scotch Bonnet will be between 32 and 120 times hotter. Do you want to do a comparison test?
I’m not a parent so must ask exactly what he was teaching the little girl. How to be a sneaky bully?
Some things my parents tried to teach me stuck and others didn’t.They did brainwash me so that if I’m a guest in your house, I’ll eat what you give me and say thank you. That would include Scotch Bonnets.
I’ve found that my childhood friends that got privileges taken away and have more bossy type of parents along with somewhat unnecessary rules, became very good workers but at the same time just good workers and not entrepreneurs or higher upper class.
Friends that had strict discipline/kind of parents with belts, but also had a “hobby” since they were young like musicianship, sports, programming or whatever niche, became very good at their craft and most of them very humble people with some exception. Many very successful. Most of them are not in a relationship.
Friends that had parents who talked with them and KNEW how to talk to them are high educated and seem very happy, successful and stabile with relationships.
The later one was parents that had like a very good education or entrepreneurs or like just owners of big companies.
This is just observations from my perspective, so I wouldn’t present them as true facts.
What do you guys think? I find this very interesting. I had a very wise person explain to me – the difference between punishment and discipline. Punishment is more about payback, while discipline changes behavior and builds character. And don’t discipline while you’re angry.
I find it remarkable, that my most strong-willed child – needed the most discipline, but when he got set on a “right direction” – even now in his 30’s – he won’t waver.
We would tolerate NO disrespect. Wife would clue in very quickly to the kids being disrespectful to me – & I would clue in when she was involved. We both re-enforced each other’s rules and methods. IT was a – you’re moving out in a few years (or sooner) – you don’t get tot talk to my wife/husband – like that. Period.
We had a pile of rocks in the back yard (from the garden) – that quite often were looking for a new resting place. The methodology was – you’re wasting my time having to deal with crap that you know better than trying to pull. You want to waste my time – I’m going to waste yours. I want that pile of rocks moved to the other side of the yard. That pile of rocks may have needed to move 3-4 times in one setting before we were satisfied with their location